Wally Croft radio trailer

Trailer task by omg-its-laura-bailey

Wally Croft script

Wally Croft

CBA: V/O
One Girl. One Mission. One town.

Music- 5 seconds

CBA: V/O

Wally Croft- An outsider searching for an unknown destiny.
A glamorous companion (ahem) tracked down by a murderous villainous gang,

(music 10 secs)

(dialogue from film-
Chav: Awa lassa we’ll well mash yah up daft lass! Dissin’ owa city! Yerh that’s it bike away!!!!

(Sounds of explosion)

Wally Croft:

Dirty stinking cyber-chavs

Music …

CBA V/O
Wally Croft …. 23rd February 2012

Full-length feature film review (The Human Centipede)

Plot overview: 'Two American college girls become the subjects of a sadistic medical experiment while on a road trip across Europe. Invited to a party by a handsome waiter, Jenny and Lindsay are en route to the festivities when their car breaks down in the middle of nowhere. Desperate, they decide to seek help on foot, eventually coming across the home of a retired surgeon named Dr. Heiter (Dieter Laser). Dr. Heiter is internationally renowned for his work on separating conjoined twins, but these days he's using his surgical skills for something entirely different. His goal is to create a human centipede by removing his patient's kneecaps, and sewing them together, mouth-to-anus. The only thing preventing Dr. Heiter from carrying out his experiment is a lack of human subjects. When Jenny and Lindsay arrive on his doorstep, Dr. Heiter enthusiastically begins prepping for surgery.' 


A Review/ comments: 'It's an undeniably revolting concept, but most of the actual gore would be matched by your average pre-watershed medical shock doc.' - Quentin Clarke


+/- Out of 21 critics, 11 critics liked it. They are reviewed by either independent site members or journalists.


 An abundant critique that reviewers comment on immediately is the director Tom Six's explicit, gruesome and utterly mind-boggling concept of creating a triplet-Human centipede, attaching the victims mouth-to-anus as to create a creature with one singular digestive system. No director in history has ever stretched the boundaries of gore and horror as much as Six, and the latest addition 'The Human Centipede II: Full Sequence' is banned from release in England due to its horrendously gory qualities. As the genre remains to be referred to as a slasher horror, it is still obvious that this film definitely tests the genres limits. Surely a film of this degree of horror deserves it's own category.

SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FWEND

PRESENTING LARA WALLY CROFT

Yes that's right, may all you Trash-Chavs run in fear for this saucy, kick-ass, extremely-applaudable-hiding-ability woman is back in town and she's on a mission!

OK back to reality for a brief moment. First thing's first- this was not my idea. 'Twas my ever-enthusiastic optimist of a group member Paige's. And at first, I thought the idea was ludicrous. I mean, a legendary Amercian action heroine who, alongside Futurama-Bender lookalike C-B-A, aims to vanquish a small, suburb in space from Trash-Chavs (which are, basically, chavs with incredibly spikey, robot-impaling hair.)

Like, how orginal can you get, right...?!

WRONG

As we built the storyboard, I began to sense that Paige's mentally, dumb-founded idea could actually work :)

Here is a brief run-down about The Adventures of Wally Croft;

•  The genre we are focusing on a Sci-Fi/ Crime hybrid but with the occasional comedic element. Albeit we were begged by our Media teacher to steer clear from the comdey circuit, we feel that C-B-A wouldn't have his spark without his funny bone.
•  Hyperbole will be a key theme; we are talking about a century light-years away. Society itself will be bigger, bolder and crazier than ever before.
• Ms Croft has a variety of able weapons - acid-squirting pistols are a popular favourite of hers.
• We may choose to animate the film because some of the stuff that happens in the plot is just not plausible in the sad reality of 2011.
• There are two gangs Marco the robot gang and Jahnny the human gang, both gangs present Todorov's main persona on the main character of the villian, in charcteristic and behaviour wise etc.
• C-B-A is Croft's sidekick but in a twist, C-B-A is working for Marco 'cos C-B-A owes Marco a debt that he can't pay back, therefore has to give Croft in himself.